I, Sex Therapist

When I walked into the conference room where my colleagues and I process the sessions we have with clients, one who had been watching me conduct a session just moments before greeted me by saying, "Well, hello, Dr. Ruth."

I did not find tonight's conversation as "explicit" as my colleagues, but that may have something to do with two things:

First, I seem to be much less distressed by the content of sessions than my colleagues in general. Perhaps my work as a journalist prepared me to do this work in ways so profound that even my understanding of that influence is too limited to comprehend. Or perhaps I am just so inept that I don't realize when I'm treading into territory where I should be more cautious.

(Naturally, I like the first option better. But I keep the second in mind because caution is critical in this area.)

Second, there's no doubt my Human Sexuality in Counseling course came in very handy tonight. The professor's reiteration, many times, last weekend of the importance of being direct and matter-of-fact, as well as using more formal terminology, in discussions about sex with clients was apparently well-received by me.

Sex was essentially the topic for 50 minutes of a 55-minute discussion. I hung in there like a ... well, like a professsional. It seems I frightened the instructor who was watching the session on a monitor in the conference room, but in the end, he said it was "really good work."

I have nothing to compare it to, but it sure was interesting for me. It would seem I'm not so off-target in thinking of doing sex therapy after all. Even though, as I put it when the teacher asked me about my internal process, I don't *do* heterosexual sex.

Of course, that might be another reason I don't find it as distressing. I don't have a lot of counter-transferrence. Perhaps it would be a totally different story if a lesbian walked in the door and started going down the path I went down with the client tonight. But perhaps not. Perhaps I just know how to maintain good boundaries in this type of work with people.

And maybe -- just maybe -- this profession is something I will learn to do well. The Classmate with No Nickname told me a few weeks ago, "You were *made* to do this work. People need you to do this work." I thought she was just flattering me at the time, but there are moments here where I think she might actually be on to something.

As Anais Nin once noted, there comes a point when it takes less work and risk to blossom than it does to remain tight in the bud.