Where's my error-proof test?

I don't think it's official yet, but it seems some leg cramps I had earlier today were evidence that I, your dear UCM, am ... pregnant.

I had the pleasure this evening of having a one-on-one session of vinyasa yoga at the studio across the street from my home. During one of the first leg stretches, I got a funny fluttering cramp in the arch of my foot, then a little in my thigh. I shook out my leg and repositioned myself in the pose, and they went away.

A little later, in a bridge pose, I got a small cramp in my hamstring on the same leg. I lowered myself from the pose and repositioned. It didn't go away, so I sat up and massaged my leg for a moment. I commented that there's something missing in my food.

Trying to be helpful, as as we were alone in the room, the yoga instructor, with whom this is my first class, said to me, "Well, it's pretty common among pregnant women to get cramps like that in the legs, so you can always check with your doctor and figure out what to do about that during pregnancy."

She was suggesting I'm pregnant. Seems I'm already ... uh, showing.

Um, I said, I think it's more likely that some essential nutrient, such as potassium, is missing from my diet during the past few days.

"Oh," she said with a little wince. "Or that could be it."

Nice....

Suffice it to say, I remain as pure as the driven snow -- but not the least bit pregnant.

And in truth, I think it's an improvement to be assumed pregnant rather than fat. I think this mistaken assumption happened because my middle pooch is firmer that it once was, and I'm carrying my body differently. Friends regularly ask me if I've lost weight recently, and I haven't lost a pound. So I must be changing shape in a good way. As weird as I think it is to be thought pregnant, it's not as humiliating a statement about body shape as many other women might find it.